Every person is different, and every divorce is different. But certain fundamental precepts apply to each person going through these difficult events. Here are eight statements of fact, which apply to every divorce proceeding:

1. CONSIDER YOUR DECISION CAREFULLY - A divorce is a serious and final act!. Be sure your situation justifies this drastic remedy.

2. COUNSELING - In some cases, marital counseling can resolve difficulties between you and your spouse. If successful, a divorce may be unnecessary.

3. PREPARE FOR STRESS - Studies have shown divorce to cause extremely high levels of stress second only to the stress caused by the death of a family member. If necessary, talk to a mental health professional so you can deal more effectively with the stress.

4. CONSIDER YOUR CHILDREN - Try to keep your divorce between you and your spouse. Keep your children out of the conflict.

5. FOCUS ON LONG-TERM ISSUES - Issues like alimony and child support are more important than short-term issues such as how the wedding gifts are divided. Concentrate on long-term issues.

6. IF POSSIBLE, SETTLE YOUR DIVORCE - Approximately 90% of all divorce actions are settled, and not tried by a Judge. It is in your best interest to reach a prompt, amicable and inexpensive settlement.

7. RETAIN AN ACCOUNTANT - Tax laws have a major impact on divorce cases. Work closely with an accountant to be sure your divorce settlement maximizes your own interests.

8. CHOOSE THE RIGHT ATTORNEY - Choose someone who will work to resolve your situation amicably. Attorney fees for contested divorces can be substantial. A competent matrimonial attorney will minimize these costs so you can save money. Because of the intimate relationship between attorneys and clients in divorce cases, you must have trust and confidence in your lawyer.